c'est la vie

   I haven't written on this thing in a while. Part of its just nothing has been going on in my life. My biggest debate is whether to go to Europe this summer. God willing I will be in Italia in June. I'm still trying to figure out how I want my life to go. I'm not excited about my classes this semester. I'm taking geology, the geology lab, two University studies classes and one on serial killers. I hope at least part of geology will teach us how to use a loupe.    As for the presidential election where to start? I just had this chat with Travers and the truth of the matter is that I'm underwhelmed and I think that the republicans are screwed. Which is probably what we deserve as I must say I am a little annoyed with my comrades in arms. Actually, I'm more flabbergasted. Why do people constantly seem surprised to hear I'm a conservative? What is it about my personality that makes people assume I'm a liberal? Is because I'm very live and let live or because I curse like a sailor? Moreover, why is that I find a lot of the college republicans I'm around, uh, to be shall we slightly grumpy? Eh, let's just say they don't care for me either. Probably why I always hated being in the college republicans. I think there might be something wired in a college republican that says you have to promote conformity along with the GOP. Which I find surprising as they are fighting the liberal university establishment themselves. Why does being a CR preclude accepting the typical oddball/non-establishment type?    If nothing else, its bad PR. The CR groups that don't offer haven to diversity is failing to benefit the school and is losing a golden opportunity. A lot of students would align themselves as conservatives if we weren't victims to the image. Further, I hate the word conservative as it fails to encapsulate the ideas of the movement fully. If the liberals are becoming progressives, I wish we could get a new name. Sometimes I feel like saying outloud I'm a conservatice with my wild manner, loud laugh, and general flamboyance is ridiculous. And I think everyone around me thinks it is too. I believe in smaller government, rights of the individual, guns, a strong military, and more guns. I wear animal print, talk too loud, drink too much, cuss, and, if you will forgive the immodesty, quite a bit of fun. I'm a conservative but not conservative. And its that tenet, that contradiction, that lends considerable trouble to my life. It leads to assumptions that annoy the hell out of me, even though it does come in handy in making me more endeared to my psychotically liberal professors. But even that is irksome.    Indeed, I am in limbo on many issues. I am a gypsy, searching for a permanant home and a purpose. I can dabble in my little tantrums and crises because I am a child of indulgent parents and a self indulgent generation.    Which brings me to the latest thing on my mind. When is self indulgence go into the realm of unforgivable selfishness? I seem to be surrounding myself with people who are taking self indulgence to the point of hurting others. Don't get me wrong, I'm all about the celebration of self. Let's remember that I'm the person whose life long ambition is to have a national holiday named "Crystal Boyd Day" just so there can be an annual parade all about me. With Elephants, twirlers, and shriners in those little cars. But I keep thinking about Natalie Holloway and how what happened to her could easily have been anyone of the people I know. They do things with the idea that its their life and they should live it up. Yet, I think its important to remember how many people have invested in our existance and their pain if something were to happen to us. Not just our parents, but everyone that would mourn the passing of a reckless youth. I'm so annoyed with this idea of each person's life being their own. No man is an isle and everything we do affects the people around us. About now it the time people should be realizing that doing the stupidest thing possible and blaming alcohol or youthful stupidity is immature and a dangerous habit to get into.    Well, thats about all my rants. In other thoughts, Tony Romo is utterly overrated, I want another dog I can name Dorothy parker, househunting is going to be the death of me, and my diet starts tomorrow. Kill me now. I'm actually looking forward to class so I can back in my routine. “When you have only two pennies left in the world, buy a loaf of bread with one, and a lily with the other.”-Proverb “There are people who strictly deprive themselves of each and every eatable, drinkable, and smokable which has in any way acquired a shady reputation. They pay this price for health. And health is all they get for it. How strange it is. It is like paying out your whole fortune for a cow that has gone dry.”-Mark Twain